Lillywhite and Blue (Audere Est Facere II)

Carling League Cup Final, Wembley Stadium

Juande Ramos - A sign of things to come


Berbatov cooly takes the penalty, the crowd goes nuts. 1-1. Game on!

Final Score: Chelski 1 - Tottenham Hotspur 2 (AET)
BBC Match Report

Exercise is good for you

Just got back from fighting the onset of obesity in the gym of my local Sports Centre. Sweating off the KJoules and getting my blood pumping. Anyway, whilst I was there, pounding away on a treadmill, I saw something out of the corner of my eye that reminded me of this video...

Frank Black - Your Mouth Into Mine
Hear tracks from the new mini LP SVN FNGRS over @ blackfrancis.net
I only started going to the gym in the new year but I can feel the benefit already. I can't see my abs yet but I can feel them in there somewhere! More reps needed. More crunching required.

This fitness lark is quite a battle though, and I'd say it was more of a mental challenge than a physical one. It's not the exercise that's tough, it's what lies waiting outside; Just as you exit the gym you enter a snack area, piled up to the ceiling with scrumptious looking cakes, donuts and chocolate bars and thirst quenching sugar drinks. And then, as you leave the Sports Centre building, you are surrounded by a Thai restaurant, a Steak House, an All-U-Can-Eat Chinese and a pub. They are all very tempting, and the more exercise you take the hungrier you get! So far I've only succumbed to the pub, but I suspect it won't be long until my brave resistance fails completely and I submit to the heavenly smell of cooking beef and pork. Hmmmmm pork.

Time for me to lay down and take a rest.

Audere est Facere

Yes. Woohoo. Yes. Yes Yes! Yeeeehaahhh! YES YES YES!!!!! WOOOHOOO!!! He he he...
Yes! Oh God YES! Yes Sir! Oh YES!!!!!
Yee-essss! YES! YES! YES!

We Love Martin Jol

I have seen football future...

I have travelled forward in time (and back again) using the Big Brother Time Machine. The final standing of the Premier League at the end of season 2007/2008 will be as follows:

01 Manchester United
02 Liverpool
03 Chelsea
04 Tottenham Hotspur
------------------------
05 Arsenal
06 Portsmouth
07 West Ham United
08 Everton
09 Blackburn Rovers
10 Newcastle United
11 Sunderland
12 Bolton Wanderers
13 Aston Villa
14 Fulham
15 Derby County
16 Reading
17 Birmingham City
------------------------
18 Manchester City
19 Middlesbrough
20 Wigan Athletic

All three promoted teams to stay up.

Fight the flab

I woke up this morning and took a long look in the mirror... boy, am I out of shape; Apart from the occasional short jog I'm getting no exercise at all. I've been spending way too much time lounging around watching Big Brother on TV.

Shocked by the reflection of flabbiness that confronted me, I decided I'd get myself an exercise video to help trim my waistline a little - turn my bread bin stomach into a nice washboard. But which video should I buy?

It's all so confusing - all those different 'celebrities' in leotards.. should I choose Jane Fonda, Jade Goody, Anthea Turner, Davina, Lorraine Kelly, Mr Motivator or Venessa Feltz? A good East End workout with Patsy Palmer sounds like it might be fun? Right... Pilates, Boxercise or Aerobicide? Phew, I just get worn out thinking about it!

Hold on a second, I've already got a fitness video I can use. Let's see, clear a space on the floor in front of the TV, put this VHS tape in and let's go...

Yes, it's B-Movie Scream Queen Linnea Quigley!


'First of all, it's important to wear comfortable clothes when you exercise. A metal studded bra and fishnet stockings may not be your first choice... but face it, would you want to watch me workout in a baggy sweatsuit?'


A few simple stretches to start...


And now it's getting much harder.

And relax.

See the lovely Linnea perform the Virgin Dance of the Double Chainsaws in the classic trash movie Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers

The new London 2012 Olympics logo is...

A pretty freaky, psychotic splatter that looks like a big pink puke*. You can almost smell it.
It's been suggested that in five years time people will have grown to like the design. I'd say that is as likely as the Olympic Stadium being finished.
Sadly, I'm not allowed to display the logo here as I'm not an official sponsor.

* Also available in hueys of blue, orange and green.

The whole kit and caboodle

OK loyal Spurs fans, we're not actually sure of qualifying for the UEFA Cup yet but here are not one, not two, not three but FOUR new kits you can buy to wear next season anyway...


I must say that I do like the look of them. I might even buy one of the shirts, although the last one I bought, 16 years ago and made from some non-degradable poly substance, is still as good as new.

The official reason for all these new kits is "to celebrate the 125th year of the club". Great, but wouldn't one shirt or a badge have been sufficient? I guess not. The real motive is to make money. Lots of money. Apparently, the logo of the Club's sponsor will appear in Mandarin Chinese script on the away and the third kits!

"The Club has always enjoyed massive international support and it is a mark of the Club's tradition and success that we can now look to broaden our appeal in markets such as China". It sounds like a waste of time if you ask me - they're all wearing Man Utd kit already. Besides, I'm not sure the Chinese scripted shirts will prove to be very popular if taken on another pre-season tour to Korea!

Get on your bikes and ride

So I might not have time to prepare for actually running the London Marathon but to make up for it I could enter the London leg of the 2007 World Naked Bike Ride! Wheels are due to start turning at Hyde Park on Saturday Afternoon June 9th. Here's a video clip from last year's event...

Anybody spot David Cameron?

It's a fowl Ref!

There is no doubt in my mind that the poor form shown by Tottenham Hotspur so far this season is due to friction in the camp. This unrest is
caused by the pseudo Chirpy that terrorises home games.

The good old friendly Chirpy (pictured) has been replaced by an evil looking imposter. It's hard to find a photo of this new scary looking creature. The navy blue headed thing pretends to warm up with the team before games but I'm sure it's really looking to see which Ball Boy it can sink it's talons into after the final whistle.

So the old Chirpy has a white head and can't save half time penalties, so what? Bring him back now!


Hundreds of fans feel the same way as me. I've just found an online petition. Please sign it and help bring the real Chirpy back to White Hart Lane.

Thank You.

Bring back Chirpy Petition

It's all going to kick off

The new Premiership season starts today. Already? It's seems like the World Cup was only a couple of months ago...

England's 'performance' in Germany was so dire that I'm still feeling a little jaded where football is concerned. This malaise however will soon pass at Tottenham Hotspur's first home game on Tuesday; When I hear 'In goal, Number 1, Paul Robinson' booming out over the White Hart Lane PA my enthusiasm will return. Life will, for the moment, be great again; Defoe! Keane! Berbatov! Zakora!
C'MON YOU LILLYWHITES!

This morning all teams are, of course, equal on points so fans everywhere will be feeling optimistic about their club's chances in season ahead. Come the end of September though expect reality to sink in. Most fans will by then be slagging off their Managers, followed closely by their players. It's all part of the fun of being a 'supporter' - you can express all of your frustrations about life and direct them at, for example, Emile Heskey, Christiano Ronaldo or Paul Stalteri. I say Paul Stalteri sadly because I know that the bloke who always sits behind me will hurl expletives at him within five minutes of every kick off. Personally I try to provide encouragement towards players of my team no matter how bad they might be. I save any insults for the opposition. I tend to offer the odd pantomine boo.

So who will win the league this season? My tea leaves tell me it is going to be Liverpool. They've bought well in the pre-season transfer window. The addition of a taff and a ginger guy provides their squad with the ability and strength to overpower Chelsea this year. At the bottom end of the table, Aston Villa, Fulham and Watford will be relegated. How will my team Tottenham Hotspur fare? I think they will struggle playing away but will always be good at Gnome games.

Supporting West Ham can be bad for your Elf

Premiership 2006-2007 Predictions

The fixture list for next season has just been published.
How will your team fare? Crystal balls in hand, I predict...

Arsenal is strategy game very similar to command & conquer
Aston Villa is getting more than a bit tiresome
Blackburn Rovers is not going to happen
Bolton Wanderers is being linked to a move to Tottenham
Charlton is easy if you have a map
Chelsea is a 3 and a half year old female located in Plymouth
Everton is a hard place to come
Fulham is sadly closing shortly
Liverpool is thrown out by high court judge
Man City is the best laxative you can take
Man Utd is to be a criminal offense
Middlesborough is bloody miles away
Newcastle is pork
Portsmouth is closing its doors
Reading is not a natural process
Sheffield United is in doubt following a freak injury sustained at home
Tottenham Hotspur is a cockerel and I need it to be a fighting cockerel
Watford is a small town with "big issues"
West Ham is being hit by giant hammer
Wigan is about to capture some of this continental magic with proposals for it's own farmer's market the monthly event will be a welcome boost for crisis

courtesy of Googlism

Boring Boring Chelsea

Well most pundits seem to think that Chelsea are running away with the Premiership already and are unstoppable. I'm inclined to agree. There's also a lot of criticism about how the games have become boring and that teams are cancelling each other out. Chelsea have even been given the old "Boring Boring" tag that used to belong to the pre-Wenger Arsenal. Chelsea are boring in the sense that, although superior to any opposition, they tend to only do what is necessary to win. They rarely get out of second gear and break into a sweat. As if to proudly claim this dubious accolade, Manager Jose Mourinho, interviewed in this week's Time Out London, says that his favourite musical artists include Pink Floyd, Bryan Adams, Phil Collins and Sting. Guilty as charged.